Coping Pains
Are you someone that needs to stick to a particular routine in order to feel a certain way? Maybe we will call it, a “good” feeling that you find yourself clinging to in order not to feel something else, some alternative to “good”? In other words, are you someone that doesn't feel very grounded or secure in who you are, what you want, what your purpose is?
If any of that resonates with you, you might be living through coping mechanisms. There might be a palpable layer of fear just under the surface for you. Perhaps you meditate, practice yoga, tai-chi or any combination of a myriad of modalites, systems, or practices. But are you “doing” meditation? Are you “doing” grounding or exercising? Maybe you've experienced strong urges to constantly seek new diets, spiritual beliefs, or other things to feel better or complete. If so, I can relate and have learned that coping is a defense mechanism. Coping behaviors are in place to help distract us from making decisions about our lives and acting upon them, they block change in our lives. Change is scary. Change means behavioral change, which means identity change. In other words, actual change is no small thing. It only happens when we can feel brave enough to surrender, to let go of whatever outcome awaits and by being honest about how we are behaving. Being kind/easy with ourselves, going slow and learning to cultivate a pure curiosity towards our process, actions, thoughts, sensations etc. is worth keeping in mind. Being slow and easy is a good way to make sure we arent engaged in a self-fulfilling prophecy, regurgitating old patterns. It can be the difference between “doing” change being changed.
Ever heard the saying, “you are getting in your own way!” Well, that is what I am also saying with coping pains. The good part about coping behaviors is how tangible and obvious they are, even to others. This is not to say that we shouldn't all have ways we relax, zone out or chill. “Doing” down time is quite healthy and a part of an embodied and well regulated human nervous system. Clinging to behavioral actions to keep us feeling “good” however, is a sign of dysregulation. It is our brains telling our bodies that, ‘it’s not safe up here, let’s stay in fight, flight or freeze as our normal stasis!’ Now picture a system under that amount of duress, functioning at such a high level for an extended period of years… We then wonder why we develop so many -isms and symptoms, auto-immune disorders and the like? Sheesh, it's a little exhausting just to describe it here. My body remembers this state of being so well, it's so well rehearsed and quite good at being in this heightened response pattern, that I can feel the pull back in to the familiar, even as I write this.
Pattern interrupters are important in learning and growth. It's okay to have interruptions, whether they are good for us or not. They are necessary when we are unsure how to take care of ourselves or grow up.
A Somatic Journey is the sensational journey of using your body to learn about your body which inherently includes your self-image. Your self-image is what you are dealing with when coping behaviors prevail in your life. It is what you are dealing with when the effects of even one coping behavior permeates other areas of your life in a negative way. Our self-image is directly related to how we access our purpose, our creativity, our lives in an actionable and healthy way. Somatics are the self-study of your body but not from the outside. They are self-induced moments of observation. It is a direct path of self-learning. The way a scientist would observe a specimen. The scientist would be curious about everything, would suspend their judgements and would stay as aware of the whole picture as they could at all times. This is not something I suggest we do all the time. But learning when and how to apply our ability of observation and then pointing it inward, is where Somatics and specifically The Feldenkrais Method, come into play.
The Feldenkrais Method for me has been the ABC’s, the beginning steps towards learning how to cultivate my power of observation, fueled by genuine curiosity, and pointing it inward.
Using your body to learn about your body does not mean using emotions, or thoughts to “figure out” what is there. It means noticing what sensations you can notice in your body and then following those sensations by staying engaged in the observation of them. Sensations are the language that our bodies communicate to our brains through (whether its listening or not). They are the path we follow in order to know how our body is doing and generally what's going on from the neck down. This path is essential in gaining a broader picture of how we do what we do. In short, this journey can be an earnest beginning towards expanding the conversation we are all constantly in within ourselves, to include MORE of ourselves.
Interruptions can be a powerful tool in breaking free from a pattern of coping behaviors. Coping mechanisms are often a defense mechanism pitted against change. A simple example of a pattern interrupter is doing an Awareness Through Movement® lesson. It could as simple as going on a walk or to just stop what we are currently doing and sit with ourselves in the moment. Coping mechanisms are behavioral patterns that highlight our fears of identity change. It is easy to cling to these behaviors and distract ourselves from making important decisions about our lives because they are a sense of control. However, if we want to grow and mature, we need to learn how to interrupt these patterns and embrace change in a slow, methodical and safe way. In other words, start acting like a safe person, a safe place to be. Characteristics of safe people and environments: slow to change or react, grounded, calming and open.
One way to interrupt our patterns is through a Somatic Journey, which involves gently directing our attention towards our sensations in a particular way that we feel a sense of curiosity about what is there. Somatic Journey is combining The Feldenkrais Method with a Shamanic Drumming experience. The drums themselves are modeled after ancient instruments, played in ways passed down through the generations, designed to peel back the veil of our consciouness. One could say it adds a layer of Trance to the self-referencing journey. And By noticing and following our bodily sensations, we can expand our self-conversation and gain a deeper understanding of ourselves. Setting our intention to learn what is there for ourselves so that when the sound of the drum is disarming, acts as a catalyst, catapulting us right past our protective layers and into our inner experience. Ultimately, this can help us access our purpose, creativity, and take action in our lives in a more meaningful way.
